Good Morning Dear Readers (I swear I’m coming up with something else to call you kind people)!

I’m hiding in the home office; we’ve a house guest, and for those that have been paying attention, you all know how I like my alone time – a lot of it.  House guests are not conducive to being alone.  Like a hot-house flower, they need attention.  They require entertainment and conversation.  They require the presence of person and mind.  You have to cook for them (okay, this part isn’t so bad… I like to cook).

I like to spend my mornings puttering about, sipping my coffee that is yet too hot to gulp as if I were dying of thirst, letting thoughts rattle around in my head.  This morning I was washing dishes, a very meditative task, and then I heard a cough behind me.  It was our guest, my brother-in-law.  I don’t know how long he’d been standing there… but he hadn’t say anything.  I said, “Good morning”, he responded in kind… and fell silent.  I went back to washing dishes, letting the thoughts rattle around once again.  I’m one of those folks that needs prompting to continue in conversation.  No prompts?  I’ll happily go back to the conversation in my head.

I don’t want it to sound like my brother-in-law isn’t a fun person, he can be very interesting to talk to, when he talks.  What happens, however, when you get three fairly quiet people together in a room, is that they all just sit in silence and stare at each other.  Or in this case, two of them stare at each other (or at me) as I stare off into space pondering my rattling thoughts (insert clever stick-figure drawing here).  Then DH will wave his hand across my line-of-non-sight to break me of my reverie in hopes that I’ll put on my “extrovert clothing” (my personality allows for being a chameleon – being what I need to be) and get conversation rolling.  I want to say, “You lived with each other for 17 years… you don’t need me to carry the conversations”.  But I don’t.

But now, it’s my time.

In less than 48 hours, the clocks here in the good ole Central Time Zone will flip over to 2013.  It’s been an interesting and opportunity-filled past year.  The fast-approaching 2013 also has a great many wonderful things already on the books.  I’m excited for everything I know will come my way.  Good, bad and otherwise, there is so much opportunity and occasions to learn.  Damn right I went all “Pollyanna” on y’all right there.

Now, I’ve mentioned this before, but I won’t be doing Sunday Search Terms anymore (okay… I HEARD that collective sigh of relief… and yeah, I was growing tired of it, too).  So let’s get it out of the way for the more important, and much more fun, facts!  Top Search Term for this last week was:  someone has made a mountain out of our molehill.  No kidding!  I hate when people “get all up in yo’ biz-nez”.  They make a big deal over not much a’tall.  The worst part is that they get involved in things that have nothing to do with them.  Sonsofbitches.

The Honorable Mention Search Term for this week goes to:  hate musingsofamuse.  Really?  Someone wants to end the year full of hate?  Maybe they were just wondering if I wrote about haters?  Well, that could be.  Haters gonna hate!  Seriously though… if people have an issue with me, I’m not a mind reader, you need to just come right out and say what your problem is.  If I like you, maybe I’ll see what I can do about adjusting.  If I don’t like you, I might tell you what you can do with your issues.  That’s part of my charm, you just never quite know what I’m going to say.  By the way – if you don’t like what I write, don’t follow me – it’s pretty simple.  (I feel like Howard Stern*.)

Researcher: The average radio listener listens for eighteen minutes. The average Howard Stern fan listens for – are you ready for this? – an hour and twenty minutes.
Pig Vomit: How can that be?
Researcher: Answer most commonly given? “I want to see what he’ll say next.”
Pig Vomit: Okay, fine. But what about the people who hate Stern?
Researcher: Good point. The average Stern hater listens for two and a half hours a day.
Pig Vomit: But… if they hate him, why do they listen?
Researcher: Most common answer? “I want to see what he’ll say next.”

*You can find more quotes here.

Now, the facts!  To Infinity and Beyond  (or at least just through the end of the year)!!!

Random Facts 359 – 366

Random Fact #359 – I have never paid anyone to decorate my Christmas tree.

This is a continuation of last week’s facts.  No, I’ve not paid anyone to decorate my tree… I’m too “Scroogey” for that.  (That’s a word… I just wrote it.)

Random Fact #360 – I have to dance to “I Feel Good” by James Brown every time I hear it.

I think secretly, everyone does – or wants to.  How can people hear that song and NOT feel good and want to dance?

Random Fact #361 – I look forward to Christmas Morning every year.

I still get all giddy and want to rush over to see what Santa, or DH, brought me.

Random Fact #362 – I appreciate mistletoe; much more so when I’ve had adult beverages.

I couldn’t find mistletoe this year.  Granted, I didn’t look too terribly hard for it, but you know… I was looking.  Don’t people hang mistletoe up anymore?  I think I’ve come to the decision that I need to make a “Kissing Ball” to hang up every year just to see if people notice (and use) it.

Random Fact #363 – I enjoy a good Scotch on the rocks.

Because it’s a beautiful thing, and I believe the water from the melting ice brings out more flavor in the Scotch.

Random Fact #364 – I am missing the “Mom” gene.

Yeah, it’s totally missing.  I don’t even think infants are cute (with rare exception).  I don’t like to hold infants either – they freak me out to a certain level, what with their floppy heads and fragility.  Give me a baby animal over a baby human any day – they’re much more durable.

I know I’ve offended more than one new parent with my perceived revulsion at the suggestion of holding their spawn… believe me, it’s not you (or them) – it’s me.   I just don’t want to hold your baby… talk to me again when they can sit up on their own.  I’m also pretty good with toddlers and older kids.  We get to break out the crayons and coloring books and be creative.

I just don’t want my own.  My life is pretty great.  I don’t need (or want) kids to validate my life.  I like my quiet house.  I like traveling.  I like being able to do what I want and not have to worry about the kids (being concerned with the pets and livestock is enough).  I like being able to take my heart medication to keep my ticker ticking as it should; it works out well for me.

Random Fact #365 – I like poinsettias.

They’re pretty, they’re poisonous, and they are also festive.  I don’t buy them because we have the cats… and well, the cats like to chew on the houseplants from time to time.  Poinsettias being chewed upon would be no bueno.

Random Fact #366 – Coming up with 366 facts about myself is one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done.

This truly was, by far, the hardest thing I’ve ever done.  Cardiac catheterization was easier!  Okay, it was also a lot shorter in duration.  It was also scarier.  But having to come up with 366 (or 365 if it weren’t a leap year) things that were factually AND even remotely interesting was sometimes a near-painful experience.  Writer’s block would stare at me and I’d think, “Nobody cares about that…. but it’s a fact.  I guess I’ll use it.”  I’m actually relieved that this project is over.  Giddy even.

And thus concludes my Project 365(6) for 2012!!!  See you next year!